What did I do?

Ever since I started blogging, I kinda open up myself to look at things differently, in different perspective, try to digest every posts I read and to read between the lines, even the simplest one, like what people eat for the day. And every single post that I read makes me wiser. I started looking back to my life, my achievement so far and what I could have done better to be in other people's shoes that I consider to be luckier. Don't get me wrong! True enough we have to be grateful for whatever we have. Of course I am. Alhamdulillah!!! But at the back of my mind...still I'm thinking....what did I do wrong? Or...how could I do it differently? Im sure many of you is running in my shoes too.


I started of quite okay...didn't do really well in school, but got myself enrolled in a private varsity and graduated with a not so excellent results...AGAIN? I had a culture shock when I entered the university. It was more like a re-birth moment for me. A SWEET ESCAPE FROM HOME...where my dad was. hahahahhaha. You know...my dad was being very protective back then. I don't remember if I have ever had any outing with my friends when I was under his regime. Poor me kan. But being a parent now I truly understand that everything he did was for good reasons.

After 30 years of life....only now Im starting to reflect all the things that is happening and has been part of my life. The journey was about the same with many lucky people, I believe.
1) Born to the world,
2) Kindy,
3) Primary school,
4) Secondary school,
5) University, (and start to enjoy PTPTN money!)
6) First love,
7) Breakup,
8) Graduated,
9) Start working (and you think ...this is it! The beginning of my career . Padahal tak pun. kahkahkah)
10) Fall in love,
11) Fall out of love (biasala. You start to meet many people while you work. So, you just want to keep your option open. hihihihiih)
12) "Thought" you found Mr.Right (Well, until you are married.hahahhahahaha.),
13) Got engaged,
14) Married (now you start thinking whether he was really your Mr.Right. hahahahaha),
15) Pregnant (and you start to appreciate your mom more than ever)
16) Give birth (you know the fact that you REALLY have to love your mom more)
17) Raise child.

So....here I am now. Raising my little woman, Iman Nadyne and trying my best to be a good mommy. I don't know what the future holds....but here is where I am now.

My point is... after we went through the same journey, we might just not ending it the same. And why is that soo???

BACK TO MY EARLIER QUESTION : Was it something that I do wrong or is there any way I could do it differently?

THE ANSWER IS : No. Not because we are unlucky but because it was fated. But of course, we can't put the blame on fate alone if we didn't work hard enough for a better future.

MORAL OF THE STORY : We can't change our past but we can change our future. So, thats what I'm going to do now, rather than feeling sorry for what I have become. Its better late than never people!